Family Marriage Counseling – Is it My Last Resort?

There is no marriage or relationship out there that is always smooth sailing. A marriage is never free from trouble, problems or obstacles. The main factor is when couples are faced with marriage troubles, how they navigate through those problems and coming up triumphant is important. Sadly, most couples look at family marriage counseling as a last resort to saving their troubled marriage from ending up in a divorce.

Think that way and you will definitely regret it later for not taking the option of talking to a marriage counselor earlier. Talking to a marriage counselor can be a proactive action to help couples stabilize their marriage and ensure that they stay married for a longer time. Through marriage therapy counseling, couples will learn to minimize conflict.

Conflicts in a marriage cannot be avoided. There are a variety of reasons that can cause a couple to have conflicts in a marriage. To err is human. Saying the wrong words at the wrong time can sometimes cause couples to clash. However, most conflicts in marriage can actually be readily resolved. However, there are some marriage troubles that do require help and intervention from others. When this happens, I highly recommend you seek help from a marriage and family counseling specialist.

Our marriage institution is so fragile now that the moment there is a sign of trouble, couples just give up. They believe the process of recovery is too painful and long to contemplate. When you try to solve your marriage troubles without help from a marriage counselor, it will seem like an insurmountable obstacle to face. However, as mentioned earlier, giving family marriage counseling a chance will help you build a more fulfilling, happy and stronger marriage.

Nevertheless, it is important that you do not have unrealistic expectations before meeting a marriage counselor. Results cannot be achieved overnight. Your marriage troubles take time to develop before it erupts. Hence both spouses must agree to invest their time and resources into fixing their troubled marriage. Any decisions into the direction of the marriage can only be determined by both spouses and not a marriage counselor. A counselor is there to only guide couples into making the right decision that is best for their marriage.

What will be the focus during family marriage counseling?

Almost all marriage therapist will advice couples to put their past behind. Couples are taught how to forgive each other. They learn how to trust and be compassionate again. Most importantly couples learn to start with a clean slate and make decisions that come from their hearts.

It is a common behavior for couples to use past transgressions as ammunition towards their spouse when new mistakes are made. The blame game can also be a contributing factor just to justify your anger every time a spouse stumbles. These are destructive behaviors that can cause repair in a marriage to hit the wall and can cause married couples to feel unhappy, exhausted and frustrated. Never justify your actions as an excuse to inflict hurt on your spouse just because they wronged you first.

Yes, the cost of marriage counseling does not come cheap. However, divorce proceedings are not any cheaper. Not to mention the emotional scars that accompanies any divorce, not only on couples but also on the children.

Seeking family marriage counseling when you try to fix your troubled marriage is a much simpler way for couples to discuss problems and issues that is affecting their marriage. It is done in an amicable environment with a mediator who has the same goal as you and your spouse – to save your troubled marriage. Surely, it is something worth considering and trying.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *